Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Deep thoughts {millions streaming through my head}

I feel like I'm constantly just thinking these days.  Then I think, am I thinking more than usual, do I think too much, should I try to stop thinking?  So much to think about!  Here's just a bit of what's been running through my mind...

{Little miss and her little nursery}... I'm thinking about totally changing up my plans for my gal's nursery. I had planned to do something very modern and a little vintage, but all with clean lines and simple colors. A little retro, maybe.  I loved these from pinterest...

I bought this rug before I was even prego, thinking it would work for either gender...

I also purchased several yards of this fabric with the same thought...

but honestly, now that she is a girl (supposedly),  I just keep thinking it all needs to be more girly.  My
thoughts have dwelt around the fact that she is going to be surrounded by so.much.boy., that she may need her space to be a bit more least when she's old enough to notice.  The truth is that I'm not all that girly.  My toes are usually never painted, my hair.. never fixed and I don't accessorize well. I don't really care for the color pink and giant hair bows, and I don't have a shoe or purse problem.  I just don't.  But I want my little gal to have the chance to be whomever she wants to be.  To not be influenced by my lack of girly, but to embrace her love for pink if that's what she loves.  I want her to love her boys, but to be set apart from them in her femininity.  I want to create a space for her that doesn't scream my name, but has a little bit of everything... with room to expand for who she is.  I'm still working on it. 

I feel the same way about her name...girly.  Honestly her name is more feminine than I thought it would be.  Had she been my first born, it would likely have been different.  We did pick her name before she was even conceived, and I was conflicted about the "girly" in it, but now I love it and I know it's meant to be.  

{Humility}... It's so important.  I need to make it a priority to teach my kids to be humble.  My parents both taught me humility and major life lessons on how pride, arrogance, self- righteousness and even over-confidence can ruin lives, families, friendships.. and personalities.  I'm thankful to have married a humble man.  To this day, there is a paper sign (in his mom's handwriting) with the scripture Luke 14:11 above the door of his old bedroom.  "For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted." The scripture that has always stuck with me is Matthew 5:5, "Blessed are the humble, for they will inherit the earth."  

It starts early.  We are already teaching lessons in humility to our 5 year old.  Let's face it.. arrogance is ugly.  

{Super random thoughts}... I was thinking on a walk the other day that I wanted to do Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace course.  I should preface this by stating that I don't necessarily think we need it.  We live about as frugal as it comes, but I just love that kind of stuff.  I am so thankful that I had a dad who made a point to teach me about budgeting, spending, debt and consequences.  I might be the only person I know who likes to sit around and watch Suze Orman late at night.  Someday I would love to teach about the value of living debt free and how to start young.  I recently found out that a local Christian school teaches this course to high school seniors, and I think that should become a required thing. Too many young people go into college not understanding the simple truths about spending and budgeting.  When I got home tonight I read Flower Patch Farm Girl's post,  and she posted on this very subject!  I loved her point of view, and agree with her.  It was funny to see, I feel that she and I think alike so many times.   

{Prayer}...  My mom is a prayer warrior, along with my grandparents.   There have been times in my life where I know that I know that only through prayer did I make it out.  Many of these times I didn't even know they were praying.  I want to be this mother to my children.  Of course I pray for them, but I want to be a true intercessor, day in and day out.  To petition God on their behalf.  When they are little and when they are grown.  That is my desire.  

{My house}... Someone needs to clean it.

{Our house}... Should we refinance?  We just can't decided.  Rates were like 3.65 the other day, which is insane.  We are just under 5, so that would save us a chunk.  I just don't ever know how long we'll stay somewhere.  Maybe refinancing would force us to stay here for a few more years to make the closing fees worth it.  Maybe not. Hmph.

{Our bed}  I think we need a new one.   We both wake up with headaches often, and just recently my back has been hurting.  This is really the last thing I want to buy right now.  

See what I mean?  So.much.thinking.  I honestly probably went through the majority of this on my car ride home alone from church tonight.  Maybe if I write it down I won't think about it while I'm trying to sleep tonight.  Here's hoping!  


katie@tulsadetails said...

Love the nursery ideas and I totally know what you mean about the thinking! I sometimes have to drive in silence (which I never used to do) just to keep from adding something else to my head!

You're such a good mom, Sarah!!

Aja said...

Totally relate! I frankly don't think guys have all these thoughts running through their heads like we do and it's not fair!

On our old bed we had this thick mattress pad that was really nice.
Like, hugely thick and heavy. It took both of us to heave it onto the bed. Anyway, it was pretty comfy. Not cheap, but maybe a cheaper option than a whole new bed?? OR new pillows? I'm the same way- wake up with headaches half the time, but that may just be my ginormous head weighing my neck down.